The Italian.

The Italian by Robert Sandy

It was the cover art that drew me in: a young boy, alone, walking on the thin rail of an isolated train track with a golden twilight at his back. The image of the boy recalled for me a Czech film from the mid-nineties called Kolya, which is a film I treasure deeply. I have a fondness for films about children and some of my favorites are those centered around the plights of the very young. When directed well and naturally inclined, child actors have given some of the most emotionally affecting and honest performances the craft has ever known. Recent examples include Jodelle Ferland in Terry Gilliam's Tideland and, of course, Academy Award nominee Abigail Breslin in what was one of last year's best performances in the indie smash Little Miss Sunshine.

When I sat down to watch the film The Italian last week, however, I had few expectations. I had rented it because I vaguely recalled that it had been well-received critically, and that first time Russian director Andrei Kravchuk had been hailed as something of a cinematic visionary, and by the end credits I understood why—on both counts.

Dickensian in tone with stylistic nods to Italian neo-realism and classic Hollywood auteurs such as Frank Capra, The Italian is the story of a young Russian orphan who, to the dismay of almost all around him, struggles against his adoption by a young, seemingly well-meaning Italian couple. Adoptions at the orphanage (adoption being an euphemism for sale in this case) are rare enough to cause a commotion among its population, and with the boy's perspective parents comes a new nickname: Italian. The new moniker is used by many of those around him with a curious mix of awe, envy and affection. There is no one at the orphanage who does not think him lucky; except him.

The boy's apprehension about the adoption process is inspired not by fear, however, but ultimately by hope; hope brought to him by the visit of a young mother seeking to reunite with the child she had once abandoned, only to find that the child was now dead. The returning mother is treated as a villain, greeted with violent disdain and quickly expelled from the overcrowded orphanage, which is held together by a motley assemblage of unreliable adults, older orphans and a harsh code of survival based ethics. The tragic woman receives sympathy from none, particularly the children, whose own parents had once abandoned them. To the children she symbolizes a loss so painful as not to be considered relevant. And when the young adoptee, called Vanya, wonders aloud whether his mother too might some day return he is quickly taken to task. Vanya remains intrigued by the woman, however, and follows her to the bus-stop to talk to her about her son. She quickly reveals herself to be an alcoholic; a guilt-ridden person, whose last hope has been extinguished with the knowledge of her son's death. She thanks the young Vanya, gets on the bus bound for the station and upon arriving throws herself in front of the train.

Thus begins six-year-old Vanya's quest for his mother and his freedom, which forms the heart of this story. No adult lets themselves hope the way a child does, and no adult perseveres as a child does and Vanya's absolute belief in his rightness is at turns, joy making and heartbreaking.

Like its neo-realistic forebears, The Italian attempts to trudge forth free of social commentary, but doe not always succeed. There is something of a fairytale quality to the story, which exempts it from the realm of pure dramatic tragedy. Vanya's frequent escapes from harm are not always entirely likely or believable and the ending, while narrowly avoiding the pitfalls of many American films of the "inspirational" genre, is not wholly satisfying dramatically.

The film's success is ultimately formed around the performance of Vanya by the amazing young actor Kolya Spiridonov, whose ability to capture the hope, loneliness, and isolation of his character is a pleasure to behold.

A bleak picture is painted here of Russia and its miserable adoption practices, which are so often little more than the ultimate example of market forces going terribly awry. It is an often dark tale where the difference between hero and villain is not always clear. It is a relevant story told with passion and, perhaps despite itself, compassion. Obvious plot flaws notwithstanding, The Italian is an amazing film with its fault lines only plainly visible to the most cynical and hardhearted.

European Perspective on U.S, Presidential Elections.

Europeans back Hillary Clinton for US president: poll

Wed Aug 29, 7:53 PM ET

From AFP

More than four in 10 French and Germans would like to see Democratic candidate and former first lady Hillary Clinton elected US president in 2008, a survey by a Canadian pollster showed on Wednesday.

The Angus Reid institute also found Clinton to be the preferred candidate of British, Italian and Canadian respondents to its poll, which asked them to choose between eight of the US politicians running for the nomination.

The New York senator, who also leads the domestic polls for her party's nomination to run for the White House -- aiming to become the first female US president ever -- was most popular in Germany, with 45.5 percent support.

Her support stood at 44 percent in France, 39 percent in Canada, 35 percent in Italy and 29 percent in Britain. The 5,075 respondents were offered a choice of four Democratic and four opposition Republican candidates.

Clinton's nearest challenger for the Democrat nomination, Senator Barack Obama, was second most popular among Canadians, Germans and the French, while Italians and Britons preferred Republican Rudolf Giuliani, the ex-mayor of New York.

But these two candidates had much smaller backing than Clinton -- Obama had highest support in Canada with 13 percent, while Giuliani had his top score of 17 percent in Italy, the home country of his grandparents.

The polling institute said Clinton, wife of former president Bill Clinton, had such a high rating because she is the best-known candidate.

Other candidates, such as Democrat John Edwards, third in domestic US polls, and Republican John McCain and Mitt Romney, had less than three percent backing from those surveyed.

Half of respondents in Britain did not know which candidate they would back. This figure was lowest in Canada at just over a quarter.

Debates and campaigns are already underway in the United States, with the first party primary votes to select nominees for the presidential race due to start in early 2008.

Hallelujah!

by Robert Sandy

With the simpler days all gone
And mother nature seeking refuge
And the gay boys seeking folly
And the priests all seeking none
And the mother's seeking justice
And the government seeking sums
And America seeking sons
And the husbands slashing away at their unborn ones.

Here, where misery is reconciled
Between the ones who can still stand the sun
And the ones who are forced to cleanse the marbled dung.

I stand here singing.

Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!
Hallelujah!

And days.
And days.
And days, undone.

And this: this is my song:

Hallelujah!

Already Gone...

by Robert Sandy

All of the wolves have gone away, they ran away yesterday.
While I was dreaming of "the best baby I ever had," or maybe laid.
Now I ain't never been so certain as when I said goodbye.
And it took me all these years to know it was a lie.

Tickety-tock and flippity-flop

Now here comes another winter.
Trick or treat and auld lang syne.
I will bury my head and wait for Leonard Cohen to make it right.

Now here comes another night.
Whacking-off in a solo flight.
Carnal philosophizing as I wait for Joni Mitchell to make it right.

Wish I could talk to Allen right now.
But Mr. Ginsberg is long gone.
He already played his "so long" song.

It is probably true that everything I ever wanted is already gone.

Everything is already gone.

Kismet and Settecase.

Sometimes life just surprises the hell out of me.

Almost twenty years ago, in another lifetime, in what feels today like an entirely different universe, I was lucky enough to be surrounded by some of the best friends and best people I would ever know. I did not know then, of course, and probably would not have believed it if you told me, that I would eventually lose contact with almost all of them. In fact, if you had asked me then who would still be in my life twenty years on I would have insisted Teresa, Anthony Settecase, Nikkie Brach, Tracy, Christine, Jason, Cindy, and well, a host of others. And I would have been wrong.

Turns out that life has a way of fucking with those things that you are most sure of, everytime. And of those seven individuals on that list, I am in active contact with two and secondary contact with a third. The rest have all vanished from my life, or I from theirs. Who knows? I don't.

Of those lost to me, however, I mourn the separation with Anthony Settecase the most. Partly because I had more fun with him than I have with almost anyone in my entire life, and partly because much of whatever real confidence I have as a person grew out that friendship.

I met Tony in the very late 1980's while working at a mall in Vernon Hills, Illinois. Tony would often come into the music store I worked at and he was something of a local celebrity. A budding musician, he was incredibly charismatic and had the kind of good looks that made women melt and made men feel uncomfortable with their own sexuality. There were hangers-on everywhere back then.

I, of course, was fascinated with him. He had an ease about him that was hard to ignore and more confidence (though, it was, I would later discover, often of the faked variety) than almost anyone I had ever seen. We had almost nothing in common outside of our long hair, but Tony and I, much to my surprise, became friends. And very good friends at that. At times, in fact, he was my very closest friend while at others merely a breath of fresh air who would come and go at weird intervals. Days, sometimes a week or two would pass with him entirely absent from my life, but he would always show back up with his ridiculous smile and things would resume post-haste.

I was little more than a geeky, long-haired, freak with almost no confidence when I first became friends with Tony, but he was able to see past that somehow and eventually helped me to see past it too. It was a pretty amazing gift to be given.

Tony and I have a long and storied history (trust me) and to recount any of it here would take many pages and many hours and would involve the changing of names to protect both the innocent and the guilty. Know this however: I miss those days and always will.

That leaves then the memories, my only link to our past. I think of Tony often still, well, almost daily, in fact, if only because of the one or two photos I still have of us which sit very near the desk I am typing this from. I was always more sentimental than him, however, and I am sure that if he were reading this he would be shaking his head and rolling his eyes--while smiling.

So what? Right?

Well, yesterday I did a google search--one I had done previously with no success--for "Anthony Settecase Musician" and I was suddenly inundated with sites and profiles and histories that included him. Tony is alive and well and still, from the looks of it, quite the looker.

Below is some footage I found on a mutual friend's website. It is, I think, from a local access cable show that our mutual friend, Johnny White, used to produce in Chicago, but I am not sure. Anyway, it shows Tony performing atop a moving bus of all things...The long hair is now gone, but the eyes and smile are still the same.

I have put out the feelers to Tony through third and fourth degree parties and so I have not, as yet, exchanged anything but one-sided notes with 'T', as I used to call him, yet...Hopefully, however, I will hear from him soon. He is living in New York I have been able to hash out, but I know little more than that.

But, for now, the knowledge is enough.

I will end here with life lesson #6999593827475:

Life is full of surprises, but sometimes you actually have to look for them.

Of breakthroughs and moorings...

I had a moment of inspiration and perhaps enlightenment. And it came today.

Some of you know better than others that I have been writing my novel for over three years now--a very, very long time. Lately, I have written a word here, a sentence there, but rarely more than that. If I am honest, in fact, I have to admit that the vast majority of the 250,000 words I have written were written in the first six months. I have not been able to reclaim the fire that burned so beautifully when I started this project and it has concerned me greatly. I have been anxious, at times even nauseous, whenever the thought of my book came to the fore. Much of this anxiety was borne of an unspoken dissatisfaction with many elements of my story and even some of the characters. I left myself in state of constant stalemate because I was too afraid to go backwards and change what needed to be changed. And why?

Well, it may sound trite. Perhaps it will sound pretentious. I don't know. But the truth is that this story came to me like a bullet from heaven. I just knew what needed to be said and wrote it down. I had not given even a moment's thought to the words, they just fell out of me and I have felt guilty about messing with what had previously felt like the divine.

Those bullets from heaven have stopped coming, however, and it is time for to take up again a book that I know is worth writing. And I must do so in earnest.

I must thank some folks now. Teresa who has read every word and believes, perhaps even more than I do that I have talent. Keith who has encouraged and sometimes even bankrolled this stalled project from the outset...he too believes. To Anita Welbon whose sentences and opinions, however few, have helped me enormously. And to my dear Jayne who was courageous in her criticism and by being so helped me to become more disciplined in my work.

I am not sure now when this will be done, but I have a path. And I have a hope.

Wish me well, please.

XOXOXO

I do not often do this...

I do not often republish, in whole, commentary from outside sources, but I found this piece very well balanced. Note, if you will, Clinton's response to direct criticism. This woman should, and I hope will, be our next president.

Clinton says negatives won't keep her from winning

By Kay Henderson 55 minutes ago

DES MOINES, Iowa (Reuters) - Democratic presidential front-runner Hillary Clinton acknowledged on Sunday that many voters do not like her, but she blamed it on years of Republican attacks and insisted she has a record of winning despite her negatives.

ADVERTISEMENT

Clinton's remarks came as the eight candidates for the Democratic presidential nomination debated in the critical early voting state of Iowa and just days after President George W. Bush's political adviser Karl Rove saying the former first lady was flawed for having high negative ratings.

Clinton and top rival, Illinois Sen. Barack Obama, came under fire early in the debate at Drake University when other candidates were invited to comment on their perceived weaknesses -- Clinton's high negative ratings in the polls and Obama's inexperience in foreign policy.

"I don't think Karl Rove's going to endorse me. That becomes more and more obvious," Clinton told the audience at the debate, which was aired by ABC News' "This Week" program. "But I find it interesting he's so obsessed with me. And I think the reason is because we know how to win."

She tackled the issue of her high negative ratings head-on, saying, "The idea that you're going to escape the Republican attack machine and not have high negatives by the time they're through with you, I think, is just missing what's been going on in American politics for the last 20 years."

Polls have shown Clinton holding double-digit leads over Obama in their effort to be the Democratic candidate in the November 2008 election.

But a recent CBS News poll showed 39 percent of all voters nationwide had an unfavorable view of Clinton, while only 20 percent viewed Obama negatively. Other polls have had Clinton's negative rating even higher.

Obama, who had a narrow lead in ABC News' Iowa poll, was criticized for his recent comments on foreign policy, including saying he would meet with U.S. rivals without preconditions and suggesting he might authorize attacks inside Pakistan without that country's permission.

"The only person that separates us from a jihadist government in Pakistan with nuclear weapons is President (Pervez) Musharraf," said Sen. Chris Dodd of Connecticut. "I thought it was irresponsible to engage in that kind of a suggestion here."

Clinton said she thought Obama was wrong in saying he was willing to meet without preconditions in his first year in office with U.S. adversaries such as Iran.

Obama dismissed much of the criticism as political maneuvering and quipped "to prepare for this debate, I rode in the bumper cars at the state fair." But he tried to paint Clinton's criticism as outdated thinking.

"I do think that there's a substantive difference between myself and Senator Clinton when it comes to meeting with our adversaries," he added. "I think that strong countries and strong presidents meet and talk with our adversaries. We shouldn't be afraid to do so. We've tried the other way. It didn't work."

The candidates also clashed over ending the Iraq war, with New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson arguing all U.S. forces should be removed and others cautioning that withdrawal from Iraq would be messy, difficult and time-consuming.

"We have different positions here," Richardson said. "I believe that if you leave any residual forces, then none of the peace that we are trying to bring can happen."

Former North Carolina Sen. John Edwards said withdrawing U.S. troops would be difficult to do quickly, but "I think we can responsibly and in a very orderly way bring our troops out over the next nine or 10 months."

Delaware Sen. Joseph Biden, while arguing for withdrawal, warned against leaving behind a country in turmoil.

"If we leave Iraq and we leave it in chaos, there'll be regional war," he said. "The regional war will engulf us for a generation."

Eric says...

My friend Eric created this amazing video and I can't even tell you how inspired I was by it. It encapsulates the last several years perfectly and hones in on the destructive rhetoric plied by the evil empire, also known as the Republican party. The Cheney intro makes me wanna hurl! I love you Eric!!!

There you have it...

Amy Winehouse in rehab. Irony prevails, as always.

___

John Irving: A Prayer For Owen Meany. It is BEYOND gorgeous. Just finished reading it, again. And I still cry like the day I was born at the end. "taking him out of our hands..." It wrecks me.

___

Taking a much needed break from the news--all news. I do not care if there is a national tragedy. NO NEWS! Too depressing. Too oppressive.

___

Just started reading the new(ish) Joan Didion essay collection. It includes "Slouching Towards Bethlehem," and I adore it. She is not my favorite writer, but she has a grasp of the vocabulary of life and a grammatical edge that escapes me. If I could write like anyone I would write like her...

___

Teresa left this morning. I am can hardly believe that she was here. So short, too short a time for friends like us.

___

Just finished watching the film "The Dead Girl." Great cinematography. Amazing performances. The script was pretty good, though not perfect. An excellent cinematic experience all around.

There you have it.

The Shine Defined.

R-

Sample

Some of you have wanted to know about my writing and what I do. I pulled this piece, which was published by La Plume-noire, as a positive example of my work. It is a review of Alanis Morissette's album "So-Called Chaos." I am fond of this review...


Alanis Morissette
So Called Chaos
Genre: Rock
Year: 2004

by Robert Sandy

With her glorious new single "Everything" and her equally breathtaking album So-Called Chaos, Alanis Morissette emerges finally from the shadow of a song that cast her as the poster girl for every angry young woman everywhere— which she never really was.

In fact, "You Oughta Know," the first, and oddly, third single from the mega-selling album Jagged Little Pill, as well as the majority of the album's twelve tracks symbolized a well thought out catharsis rather than the much publicized man-hating-anger-management-course that it was reported to have been.

Sadly, it was her reputation as reckless banshee that detracted attention from her last two studio albums, which each proved in profound ways that Morissette was an artist to be reckoned with. Morissette’s sadly overlooked 2002 album Under Rug Swept was utterly brilliant and stood, until now, as her strongest effort, far outpacing Pill in lyrical power and musical know-how.

So-Called Chaos is impressive, however, not so much for any expansive growth Morissette has experienced as an artist, but for the growth she seems to have experienced as a person. And that growth is evident everywhere, but no more so than in the first single, "Everything." It is a song of hope and abandon, of acknowledgment and acceptance, and of blame and responsibility and it is the most effective single of her career (begrudgingly, I place it above "Thank U").

Alanis Morissette's power has always been best expressed through her magnificent lyrical vocabulary and her desire to place those lyrics within a musical landscape that incorporates a continually growing world view. Chaos then is an album full of violins, sitars, cellos and a variety of other instruments not found on today's average rock album.

The album opens with "Eight Easy Steps," an Indian influenced rocker with a driving chorus that serves as an instruction manual on how to become an expert at surviving the corpses of unhealthy relationships. The track serves as a potent beginning, but some awkward lyrical segues do not render it wholly accessible as the sing-along rocker that it seems to have been intended. The tone is set here, however, for Chaos is an album of personal examination, as well as an exploration of relationships both broken and successful, and while that might sound like familiar ground for Morissette, it must be said that it is not the material that is different here, but the point-of-view. Instead of finger pointing (a decidedly human reaction to all failed relationships) or door-mat becoming, Morissette has reached the point in life and love where she has at last allowed her mind to join her heart in her examination of where she has been and where she is going.

In the moving "Not All Me" she tells an ex-lover, or maybe friend, that she will happily help them sort through the wreckage of their destroyed relationship but that she refuses to act as punching bag to a person not willing to approach the task with thought and care. As she sings, "I am the perfect target screen/For your blindly fueled rage/I bare the brunt of your long buried pain/I don't mind helping you out/But I want you to remember my name/It's not all me /It's not all my fault /I need remind you, but I won't take it all on," you almost want to offer a hug to a woman who has, at last, become just that.

"Spineless" examines the initial and critical period of relationship building where sometimes one partner's interests and desires begin to take precedence over the ideas and wants of the other, and how, later, those acts serve as the mortar casings for a doomed relationship and provide piles of fodder for therapy sessions well into mid-life. "Doth I Protest Too Much?" acts as a letter to a current/former lover where Morissette outlines who she is, or maybe who she tries to be, inside of relationships where outside pressures and personal insecurities are a constant battering hammer against the fabric of love. "This Grudge" another letter to a failed relationship might be the most moving song of Morissette's career. It is a song to that person, present in almost all of our lives, who for whatever reason still sits in the back of our head, the person who no matter how we try effects everything we do in every following relationship. It is about the inability to let go of hurt, and ultimately of our inability to let go of our one great excuse for every failed relationship since its end: "I want to be big and let go/of this grudge that's grown old," she sings and they are words that resound through the caverns of thought of any self-aware human being.

Whether it is realized now, or years from now, Morissette has emerged as a potent rock genius on par with the likes of Sting. She has much to say and provides consistently amazing new ways to share her soul's scars and celebrations. Watching her new video, "Everything" is moving and cathartic for both singer and viewer. We watch as Morissette loses the baggage of her old long hair and walks ever forward with a smile and a beauty that many did not know she possessed.

It is not hard to imagine, given Morissette's open book policy to her soul, that it is us, the listener that she addresses in the aforementioned "Everything" when she sings, "You see everything, you see every part/You see all my light and you love my dark/You dig everything of which I'm ashamed/There's not anything to which you can't relate/And you're still here." Sadly for them, most the seventeen million plus who hopped on the Morissette bandwagon in 1995 have long since abandoned one of the most enduring voices of their generation. It is her remaining fan base, however, that continue to reap the rewards of an artist constantly questioning who she is and what she knows. And while that fan base is decidedly smaller than it once was, it is a fact that Morissette now seems comfortable with, making the future seem very bright indeed.

Tuesday

"Come in, Come in...come in from the cold."

Joni Mitchell is singing to my soul right now, and I hear her. I am tired, but I hear her.

So, Karl Rove has finally resigned. This is good. Really, really good. I can feel the utter absurdity of these last years loosening their grip. Now we need a few people in Washington to summon the courage to do what needs to be done: impeach Cheney and Bush.

It will not happen, but it should.

"I am flesh and blood and vision, I am howling in the dark."

The "news" commentators are not presenting the facts. They never do. Yet, so many people listen, no thoughts of their own. Molded, shaped, and led to the slaughter.

People never learn.

Like the world is melting. There are terrible signs everywhere. But, many people still don't believe, nay, will not believe.

I believe.

"We get hurt and we just panic, and we strike out, out of fear."

I was in the store the other day and every single tabloid or personality rag still had Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston on their covers. Jen and Brad back together. Late night phone calls. Terrible fights between Angelina and Brad.

So sad and ridiculous. I caught a glimpse of Jen last week on some show and she is happy and says she hasn't seen or spoken to Brad in over a year. Duh. They are divorced. And yet people will pay $3.95 to be told otherwise--and several years after the fact.

I guess that is it for right now. Teresa is here and there are games to play and laughs to laugh and hugs to enjoy.

"Come in, Come in..."

And please remember my friends:

“The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion.” - Albert Camus

2-day

i am in an odd mood today: stuck between hope, and the (very real) fear, that my life has raced away from me. that I might not be able get it back.

i had a text message exchange with my very dear friend eric last night. it made me smile in a way that i haven't for awhile--all of my friends are so far away.

teresa comes tomorrow though.

teresa, the best of the best--and that is saying something.

next month: HOME

i will go back to Chicago to witness one of my best friends, my brother (emotionally, if not, actually), be released from prison. keith will be free. keith will be free.

free.

i am reading a wonderful book about the artist raphael right now. italy. I lived there once. it is hard to remember what it smelled like now. italy, europe--i wish i was there. wishing ain't worth the breath you waste on it though. i make that point in my book.

my book.

my novel.

it is like a child in my womb that refuses to fully develop. such a great and beautiful story it is. so needed today. i need to give birth. i am tired of this extra weight. i am tired of the questions from people who care. i am tired of being someone who is only writing a book. i need to be a man who has written a book. i have so much to say.

music. there is always music. today it is MADONNA. loving her again in ways that i cannot fully describe. she is the absolute. full-stop.

also: linkin park, david guetta, dolly parton, kelly clarkson (yes, you haters, KELLY CLARKSON), crowded house, patti smith, the dresden dolls and bowie...and tina...always and always tina.

sinead o'connor's new album bites in ways that are too painful to discuss here.

the simpsons movie. saw it twice. loved it and hated it. dumbed down but brilliant still. homer forever and ever.

the anti-war movement grows. i see signs and stickers everywhere. hillary in '08. please, hillary in '08.

love.

feel it.

spread it.

mean it.

The Shine Defined.